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Blissful Boundaries

In these days leading up to Vividly Woman Embody Self Love Intensive in BC & Ont, I’m super sensitive to the reality that it’s not easy for women to claim our space, to establish authentic boundaries, and express the truth of who we are. Boundaries, or lack of them, are central to the lack of self love issue that is so rampant in our world at the root of women’s discontent. Fortunately once you understand how boundaries work, it’s easy to claim your space, shift unhealthy patterns that cause suffering and dance into blissful boundary awareness.

I have one nagging professional relationship that used to always challenge my boundaries. I’d end up frustrated, losing my temper, running away from the conflicts. SInce I started noticing the real issue, my own lack of boundaries, everything has shifted.
What I’ve found is that a healthy felt sense boundary, one that’s always changing in tandem with who and what I’m relating to, is a great expression of loving and honoring myself and expressing my self worth to the world on an energetic level. 
Watch my 2 videos below: first, more on boundaries, and then the Vividly Woman Energetic Boundary Meditation. Enjoy whenever, wherever. It’s served me immensely in my life and it’s my pleasure to share it with you.
No, I didn’t hang the painting crookedly, the camera was off. Ooops!!
Leela Francis is a speaker, facilitator and Embody Power Expert. She’s the founder and CEO ofVividly Woman, helping women to tap into their embodied power to become thriving, healthy and fulfilled leaders, personally and professionally.

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More Yummy, Less Yucky

3 Tips for Cultivating Witness Versus Wallow Consciousness

Recently I noticed myself wallowing in some feelings of sadness. The sadness was brought on by me comparing myself to a woman who I was perceiving as more successful than I. As a result I was actively self deprecating and feeling inadequate. Yes, I confess that sometimes I do let comparing myself to others get me down, and it can be a real drag. Fortunately lately I’ve had the insight and awareness to witness what’s happening instead of let myself be pummeled by the self pity that often in the past would ensue. Though I still felt the sadness, I was also able to be with it in a way that allowed me to honor my feelings instead of be a victim to them.

Here are 3 practices that I use to get me into the witness and out of the wallower.

1. Feeling & Sensing; Notice your feelings and their corresponding sensations instead of the narrative in your mind that justifies the feeling. Letting go of the story and being a witness to sensation and feeling, brings you to truth that empowers you instead of story that debilitates you.

2. Be Self Referencing: Acknowledge self referring vs external referring behavior. Are your choices motivated by your inner preferences or by outside standards? Witness your tendency towards one or the other to identify whether you are living and choosing authentically for you.

3. Take Responsibility: Do you take responsibility for your life or do your tend to blame people or circumstances outside yourself. Witnessing why things are the way they are, with you as the director and the producer of your life, not just the lead actor, will encourage “yummy” way quicker than the victim “yucky” experience of your life’s dramas.

The cultivation of witness consciousness is an ongoing practice. We have to stalk the wallowing tendencies and be gentle when we find them, witnessing even that with a loving “ah so”, and choose to dance in the light of the witness helping to dismantle the darkness of the wallower.

Leela Francis is the founder of Vividly Woman. An embodiment Expert, facilitator and coach, she inspires the values of the divine feminine in work and in play.

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